You're in ruins
by Maroon-dragon
Summary: A one-shot on a very much used plot of the cheating Alice and Edward... with the lyrics of 21 guns-greenday...please give me some good advice on how to improve:


A/N I own nothing but the plot….sad but true….

I stumbled down the slope and into the river below. Yes me, Bella, vampire extraordinary, wife of the most wanted single man in forks in history Edward Cullen. A vampire stumble? Well I guess that happens when your husband, the one that literally promised eternity with you decides to sleep with one of the persons that was willing to grant you that eternity herself. A vampire with a grace that made many jealous. We are speaking of the one and only Alice Cullen.

The water felt mellow to my cold skin and as I sat there in the middle of the river I realized how broken I really was. AS all my anger was taken away by the water all that was left of me was a broken woman. Not the strong vampire, but the wife that gave all for the man she loved and was betrayed in the worst way possible. 40 years of my life had I dedicated to him, as I saw all my relatives die one by one because I had chained myself to an unfaithful husband. Something flickered in my eyesight and I grimaced as I looked at the ring that he had given me. I pulled it off with a force strong enough to break it. And as I crushed the metal my eyes burned with venom. Oh how I wished I could cry. My mouth opened up and a strong heartwrenching sound erupted from my throat. Screaming out the pain that I felt inside my heart.

Do you know what's worth fighting for,  
When it's not worth dying for?  
Does it take your breath away  
And you feel yourself suffocating?  
Does the pain weigh out the pride?  
And you look for a place to hide?  
Did someone break your heart inside?  
You're in ruins 

Why did happiness always seem to come with the bad. There was never no pain attached to my happiness. Why did I still stay here, why did I fight for a love that was never worth putting my life on the line for. I felt like I was suffocating, even when I did not need to breath. My pride was hurt but the heart shattering feeling I felt inside weighed out just about everything else. Why couldn't I just run, leave my life behind and start over again? I had my life here and the rest of them did not deserve it for me to leave because of him. I was broken, torn apart and ready to give up. Yet I would never let him win. It was not possible for me to give up the fight as much as I wanted to.

One, 21 guns  
Lay down your arms  
Give up the fight  
One, 21 guns  
Throw up your arms into the sky,  
You and I

I heard footsteps nearing the place I was currently occupying and a heartfelt pain washed over me. As I saw jasper stumble into the clearing I realized that he was just as broken as I was. Our mates had betrayed us. He seemed to have lost all sense of direction as he crashed into the river not resurfacing. I reached out to him, pulling him into my arms and let him dry-sob into my arms. I seemed to have stopped feeling entirely as I remembered the face of my previous love of my life. I was numb to any emotion really. As I felt him stop his sobbing he looked me in the eyes. The look was portraying the things I felt. The pure feeling of being lost. Edward had been my rock, my lighthouse out in a misty sea, the captain that controlled the vessel that was me, he had been my everything. My peace, just like Alice was his. And now that had ended. No more fairytale life for me. All that was left were two people out in an open sea of despair crying out for someone to come back, yet at the same time hoping they would never come back. My mind was broken, the barrier within me shattered and the faith I had in everything I believed in was standing on the brink of destruction. Nothing was meant to last everyone always told me, yet I had hoped that things between me and Edward would. I had been certain of that for almost 42 years.

When you're at the end of the road  
And you lost all sense of control  
And your thoughts have taken their toll  
When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul  
Your faith walks on broken glass  
And the hangover doesn't pass  
Nothing's ever built to last  
You're in ruins.

Broken, beaten and soaked to the bone we stayed there. The night fell and yet we didn't move. Daylight began to break through the star-filled sky. The reddish and orange colored light casting beautiful light paterns across the water making us sparkle. The scene was beautiful except for the terrible ache that was trying to consume me. I felt like the whole world had crashed down upon me and was suffocating me. The first time that Edward had left me I had been broken and a scar of that had always remained, now it seemed he had been hell bent on crushing every bit of my heart into dust. Letting it fly away with the northern wind that flew through the village. I wished that would be possible for it would make it possible for me not to feel. This wouldn't pass, this time he could not and would not come back. And I didn't want him too either I suppose. Jasper pulled away from me and I already missed the stability he had provided for me. He understood he went through the exact same emotions. They both had created a world for us that we had wanted to be part of and then shattered it into oblivion.

One, 21 guns  
Lay down your arms  
Give up the fight  
One, 21 guns  
Throw up your arms into the sky,  
You and I

Did you try to live on your own  
When you burned down the house and home?  
Did you stand too close to the fire?  
Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone 

As we neared the house I could feel him convulse and double over in the emotions radiating from it. It was impossible not to care for him and I quickly went to his side and kept him up as we entered the house. It was death silent when we entered and I couldn't help but wonder what everyone was thinking. I heard a moan coming from the living room, and I found Edward on the ground clutching his head and the rest of the family, Alice excluded stare at him. Apparently I didn't need to have his ability to know how angry they were, his pained expression was enough. I didn't feel any emotions except for a dull ache when I found myself staring into the eyes that used to dazzle me. "Bella, please. It meant nothing to me, nothing like you mean to me….It was just for the thrill that I did it, my heart was never involved." He ground out still clutching his head. An angry gasp came from upstairs, which I suppose was Alice her indignation. I couldn't help but feel a bit sorry for her as I realized that she was also a victim to his game. She cheated yes, and I would never forgive her for how she hurt Jasper, but to Edward she had never been more than a mere pawn in his chess game. I was his queen, to him I was everything but the pawns were the things he could lord over as their king. He grasped my hands, trying to plead with me to forgive him, to understand his reasons. I pulled my hands out of his and softly cradled his face. He was still trying to get me to give him the loving emotions I used to give him, and leaned into my soft touch. The fact was he was looking from forgiveness from a stone, my heart had solidified, not willing to bend anymore. My cradling suddenly wasn't so soft anymore and a small crunching sound could be heard as his skull started to slowly crack. Suddenly a calm emotion made me surrender and I let go. Edward moved away from me faster than I had ever seen him do before.

When it's time to live and let die  
And you can't get another try  
Something inside this heart has died  
You're in ruins.

It was time to let go. He would never be in my life anymore. He would never get another try. He had ruined me and there was no turning back. I would rise up again like a phoenix being reborn. But that would take a long time and I would never allow him back in my life again. As I turned around my eyes found Jasper his golden ones and I smiled a small smile. One reserved only for him. He had become my confident and best friend after 40 years of being a vampire. And Alice and Edward breaking it off was the best thing they could have done. I would finally be able to get together with the man I adored. The man that had been take by my best friend and broken. I would finally be able to start the relationship I always wanted with Jasper. Nessie and Jacob would understand, they had known for a long time now. I had loved Edward, but my heart had also belonged with Jasper and I had his. We had never been wanting to ruin the love we had with our original partners…but now they had made the choice so easy. They had given us a reason. No Edward would never be able to get back in my heart, that part had died but another had just blossomed.

One, 21 guns  
Lay down your arms  
Give up the fight  
One, 21 guns  
Throw up your arms into the sky

One, 21 guns  
Lay down your arms  
Give up the fight  
One, 21 guns  
Throw up your arms into the sky,  
You and I

As I grabbed Jasper his hand a tingling sensation came over me. "Let's start again Jasper, Just you and I." I whispered. And as I let the wind blow away the crushed pieces of my heart that Edward had ruined, I let Jasper make my other part beat lively and anew with his love.

A/N sorry I just reaaaally wanted to post it…please let me know what you think : ) xxx


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